My alarm goes off at 4:30 am and I groggily rouse myself out of bed, don my workout threads and hop in the car. When I get to the Breakfast Creek Lifestyle Precinct the world is still dark, but by the time I get inside Function Well’s new multi-faceted fitness hub, light is starting to break out of the horizon. By the time I finish stretching and warming up, sunlight is streaming through the floor-to-ceiling windows and illuminating the high-performance equipment I’m about to (attempt to) use. Located three levels above terra firma, Function Well’s new flagship is something to behold – that is if you can turn your attention away from the view, which stretches out above Newstead towards the city. After more than a decade at its original Newstead location, Function Well is celebrating a glow-up of significant proportions. Now housed alongside other precinct residents such as Mercedes-Benz Brisbane, Mercedes-AMG Performance Centre, Queensland Sotheby’s International Realty, Lumiere Culinary Studio, The Kneadery, MICA Brasserie and GoBoat Brisbane, Function Well is elevating its holistic approach to physical and social wellness with a suite of cutting-edge amenities. To be completely transparent, I’ve been a member of Function Well since before the move, joining the gym in 2022 after hearing that the gym’s offering was as comprehensive as it comes in Brisbane.
Spread across three levels, Function Well offers something for every fitness level and for every kind of exerciser. On level three sits the athletics zone, which is where you’ll find the gym floor (kitted out with weights of all shapes and sizes), a crossfit area, a boxing ring and a group-training room for EST and Metcon classes. This level is also home to the restoration zone, where members can rejuvenate their bodies in hot and cold magnesium plunge pools, infrared and traditional saunas, and steam rooms. Down a level sits the reformer pilates studio and a functional training zone for strength classes and the ground floor is home to an always-open spray tan lounge, if you’re looking to pair your endorphin rush with a healthy glow. For someone whose previous gym experiences extended to awkwardly lifting dumbells in a corner and spinning my wheels on the treadmill, Function Well’s palatial digs can seem a bit intimidating, but the team of experienced trainers, instructors, yogis and support staff make working out accessible – and a 4:30 am wakeup tolerable.
